Yeah. I don't really know how to process it either.
My week two weeks ago was filled with hospital trips: if my mom was going, so was I. I only didn't make it once. The first time I saw her, she wasn't very coherent and it was scary. Thankfully, due to some steroids to help reduce the swelling in her brain (she has four brain tumors...), she's been much more herself.
I haven't seen her for a week, but we'll be going to see her again soon. It's been hard, because while on the one hand it's nice to be able to say goodbye, there is so much pressure to make every moment profound, just in case it is your last one.
She's just too young, at least it feels that way, and that's what I keep coming back to. The unfairness of it all. This isn't right.
I know eventually it will be easier. But I can't even fathom the idea of a life without my grandma in it. I love her so much.
Please be praying for me and my family.