a terrible privilege
So. It's been a while since I last blogged.
I'm currently sick, and this is going to be a bit of a rambly post just to get back on the blog again. To break the ice, so to speak.
Be right back. I have to grab my tea.
Too many thoughts started pouring through my head so I grabbed my laptop and brought it to the kitchen so I can type while I wait for the honey to uncrystallize. Is this what they call liveblogging? Live, from the kitchen, Sky reports.
So as I mentioned, I've got a bit of a head cold that materialized last night. Pesky thing, that. It kept me up for quite a while and I generally didn't sleep well. I love being sick.
However, I've found a remedy that I haven't previously had: peppermint tea with honey. It works wonders to soothe my throat.
Speaking of which, I'm going to go finish making it. Be right back... again.
I'm back. With tea.
Everyone deserves tea. - Jane Bennet
So, that seems to be a good transition into my next point: The Lizzie Bennet Diaries. It's an online adaptation of Pride and Prejudice--told vlog style. It's creative. Funny. And I'm afraid I've gotten hopelessly, irrevocably attached to the characters. The story is playing out in real time in front of our eyes, so it's almost like these are living, breathing characters. The characters themselves even interact with the fans on social media. It's bringing breaking the fourth wall to a whole new level.
In addition to The Lizzie Bennet Diaries, I've been falling head over heels with The Avengers. Seriously, guys... I think I've got it bad. The other day I was completely unsure how to explain to my mom why I wanted to watch it again after watching it only a few weeks before. And a few weeks before that. I think I'm becoming addicted, and I am wholeheartedly in the Avengers fandom. (I even put a few Marvel comics on hold a couple days ago. THIS IS BIG, PEOPLE.)
The reasons for my love for the Avengers are many, but the main one is Tony Stark. I can't express how much I love him. For one thing, he's sarcastic and funny, but it's not portrayed as a bad thing like it is in so many other stories. It's portrayed as what makes him Tony. Without his sarcasm and sass, he wouldn't be Tony Stark. It's refreshing to see that sarcasm, and snark, and wit can actually enhance who we are, and doesn't necessarily have to be written out of us entirely. I can't tell you how much I appreciate that. It's made me feel like having a sense of humor is okay, and I don't have to change who I am.
I have connected with Tony Stark on a deeper level than I've ever connected with any character before, it seems. After watching Iron Man for the first time last year, my dad remarked to me that the reason Stark probably resonated so deeply with us is because he, too, is a wounded warrior. (Both my dad and I struggle with chronic illness and disabilities.) Since then, I've never been able to shake that.
There's a part in The Avengers where Tony is talking to Bruce Banner, aka The Hulk. I can't remember exactly what was said (the dialogue is too brilliant to remain in my head at all times) but I believe that they're discussing how much Bruce dislikes his "the other guy" -- aka the Hulk. He doesn't think it's a good thing, and he honestly hates it.
That's when Tony says this. This thing that really hit me hard. "You know, I've got a cluster of shrapnel, trying every second to crawl its way into my heart." He points at the mini-arc reactor in his chest. "This stops it. This little circle of light. It's part of me now, not just armor. It's a... terrible privilege."
And that's made me tear up more than once. Because this fibromyalgia, this thing I have, the thing I struggle with every day... it's terrible. But it's also a privilege.
A terrible privilege.
I've kept this with me close to my heart. And I just want to say thank you to Tony Stark for expressing something that has touched me so very deeply. Even though he's not real, I wish he could be. And if the opportunity ever presents itself, I desperately want to give him a big hug. Whether it's in this world or the next.
So anyway, I'm in tears now, but in a good way. I think I'll send this off now, and finish my tea, and go to bed.
Not to completely ruin the mood, but down to business--this post will be published using Blogger's post-to-email feature. I'm writing this in Gmail Offline and hopefully this will send tomorrow once the internet turns back on in the morning. Because this is the first time I'm using the post-to-email feature, I hope this works, and I apologise for any technical difficulties or problems. (I love spelling apologize with an s. My Canadian friend has ruined me for the better. Hey, Micah!)
Another thing I wanted to mention, now that I'm not as emotional: I was able to go shopping the other day, and even though it completely wiped me out and I ached for days afterwards, I enjoyed getting out to Wal-Mart. I bought an Avengers poster and Mockingjay earrings. Proof that even outside the house, fandoms (and Tumblr) never die.
And they especially don't die on Blogger.
\\\\///// Live long and prosper, friends. Love and hugs to you all, and thanks for reading this. ♥ Don't forget to be awesome.
(AH, YES! That's another huge fandom thing I forgot to mention: I am now officially a Nerdfighter. I completely love this community and the people behind it. More on that sometime, perhaps.)
Where was I? Ah, yes. \\\\///// Live long and prosper, friends, and I shall see you soon.